Hammer's demented poetry

I've seen a lot of poetry in my blog travels. Being of the caveman ilk, I don't usually avail myself to the fruitier pursuits. However, I think I found a way to create poetry for the common man who proudly farts, scratches his nuts and guzzles beer.

Haiku

From inner sanctum
A mighty rumble echos
Dare I release it?

Limerick

Forty beer I did consume
Cans and bottles fill me room
A hairy belly hangs o'er my belt
A more manly odor you've ne'er smelt
If you'll excuse me now my drinking must resume

Monody

Tyrone Jackson didn't do nuffin
Law done shot him cause da crack he's puffin
Tyrone bees a star aflete n sheet
Dribbles dat bassaball on the street

His momma be cryin cause he was a good boy
He thought that glock be a cheap plastic toy
Tyrone be a scholar.. smartest of his kin
He be eighteen in the third grade again

So pour out some o dat malt liquor
For da homey who shoulda run quicker
He point dat gun when da pigs sayed stop
It's all good, we get to watch you on "Cops"

Monorhyme

As I sit on the cool seat of my crapper
A Field and stream magazine sits in my lapper
I'm trying to push but the turd is a trapper
Can't concentrate cause the dog is a yapper
If he doesn't shut up I'll give him a slapper
My poop just broke off... I call that a snapper
Forgot to buy paper I've got to wipe with a wrapper