Examining the profanity.

I get quite a few comments about my creative use of profanity.

There was an episode of Spongebob on recently that called them "sentence enhancers" I kind of agree. Sprinkling these enhancers in the right places usually helps the reader know exactly how much disdain or emphasis you wish to communicate regarding a subject.

Example: The cashier at the store gave me incorrect change for my 20 dollar bill and refused to admit his error.

Enhanced: The syphilitic cunt face at the fucking store ripped me off for ten bucks and then that pole smoking cum gurgler had the audacity to deny it.

Example: Honey, do we have any of that personal ointment..my hemorrhoids are acting up again.

Enhanced: Gotdamnit! My corn hole feels like it's been sodomized with a barbed wire dildo..gimme that ass cream and a tampon before I fucking bleed to death!

The enhanced sentence seems to reveal more emotional details and gives the reader a more honest perspective on the situation.

My youth was spent less fist fighting with bullies and more trying to out insult them.
I started out innocent and pure and due to necessity I became a seasoned spewer of vile verbal filth.

It would go something like this...Setting 3rd grade playground

"Hey hammer your dad gives great blowjobs and he only charges a quarter a blow"

Me " At least I have a dad, your mom got pregnant during the third act at the donkey show"

Sometimes my insults would go too far and I would be sent to the school counselor and given a psychiatric evaluation. I either passed or was so screwed up they didn't know what to do with me.

Sometimes the 8 year old Hammer likes to take over during a blog post and sprinkle some sentence enhancers around.... and no I don't want to talk to any more fucking shrinks.