Thursday, December 6, 2007

Been thinkin


When I enter a government building and see marble floors, fancy architecture and artwork hanging on the walls, it really irks me that my tax dollars went to pay for this superflous crap.

Buildings used for government services and administration need to be prefab corrugated metal structures with minimal accouterments and just enough furniture and personnel to get the job done.

Organic foods... Either they have an odd unpleasant flavor, the exact same flavor of the normal item or no flavor at all. I'm reluctant to pay twice as much for something that isn't twice as good. I'll take my chances with the pesticides.

Why doesn't anyone complain about singers and dancers constantly grabbing and rubbing their crotch during their performances. I think Michael Jackson started it. My daughter asked me the other day why the singer on TV kept grabbing at her privates..." Dad, does she have to go potty?"

I just saw this on the news: " The new co-host of "The View," Sherri Shepherd, insisted Tuesday that Christianity was older than ancient Greece, and even Judaism.
Shepherd — who said earlier this year that she didn't know if the world was flat or round — said during a short-lived discussion of Greek philosophy on Tuesday's show that she was pretty sure nothing "predated Christians."


WTF? How could this ignorant tart ever get a job making french fries much less be paid millions to be on a daytime talk show? What on earth would this idiot have to add to an intelligent discussion?

I have to admit that sometimes while flipping channels I'll stop on Maury when he has the " Who's the daddy" segment. Some ghetto, trash hootchie has a toddler on her knee and seven prison tattooed gangster looking lowlifes lined up and she doesn't know who the father is.... To me it's hilarious to watch them squirm.

These new smart cars, you know, the ones with the computer, DVD player in the dash and all the blue tooth shit... People drive bad enough already. Putting all this shit in front of the driver is irresponsible to say the least. I can just see some lady putting on makeup, drinking coffee and checking her Email while driving 70 on the freeway then plowing into a bus load of kids.


I guess I'm done thinking for today...


31 Comments:

At December 6, 2007 at 7:23 AM , Anonymous GUYK said...

yep and people such as this dim wit are why I seldom watch TV. Yesterday the FOX cable news people were is a gotdam tizzy about cameos worn in a shopping mall...what a bunch of dumbasses

 
At December 6, 2007 at 8:29 AM , Anonymous Burfica said...

Maury cracks me up with those.

I don't buy organic here. It's so fricken expensive, and your right it taste not so good. If the pesticides haven't made me glow by now, I'm fine. hehehehe

 
At December 6, 2007 at 8:34 AM , Anonymous Jeannie said...

Our municipal government has been constantly spending fortunes on city buildings - like the city hall that I think was in Robocop - we have a new market I've never been to which replaced the old market which I rarely went to which replaced the original market which I went to as a kid which was behind the original city hall which was replaced and then replaced again. The feds have had the same building for as long as I remember. It's quite plain and functional. The people who work there are quite pleasant too.

 
At December 6, 2007 at 8:41 AM , Anonymous BobG said...

"Why doesn't anyone complain about singers and dancers constantly grabbing and rubbing their crotch during their performances."

It didn't used to be that way; these days people pay good money to watch some idiot stand in front of a crowd of people, grab his crotch, and mutter obscenities. When I was growing up, we arrested people like that.

"What on earth would this idiot have to add to an intelligent discussion?"

Which tells you something about the daily audience who watch the show.

 
At December 6, 2007 at 8:44 AM , Anonymous Dave said...

You are done thinking for today? Hey! Don't stop!! I really like the way you think! :-)

 
At December 6, 2007 at 9:23 AM , Anonymous nanc said...

it gets me that you are charged more for "sugar-free" than the stuff loaded with sugar - WUH? does it take longer to leave the sugar out?

i'm sure that was all part of mj's "incredible shrinking man" phase...

hammer - if you haven't gotten your wife a christmas gift yet, i've a great idea at curtains for you. another shameless plug i know.

 
At December 6, 2007 at 9:47 AM , Anonymous JAM said...

I think "The View" has a rule that the cumulative IQ of the hostesses must stay under 100.

I don't know whether to laugh or cry about the bump-n-grind dancing they let the kids do today. I try not to be shocked at such things but I just can't help it when you see little girls do that and you know their parents knew about it.

 
At December 6, 2007 at 9:48 AM , Anonymous Lexcen said...

Have you seen the show "Grumpy Old Men"?

 
At December 6, 2007 at 10:10 AM , Anonymous WomanHonorThyself said...

hi there..trying to think of a "pithy quip"..lol..great post though..heh

 
At December 6, 2007 at 11:13 AM , Anonymous Barbara Doduk said...

Out of the mouth of babes! "Does she have to go potty?" PRICELESS! Someone should make that into a commercial. That would sell.

Great post as usual Hammer.

 
At December 6, 2007 at 11:24 AM , Anonymous Lightning Bug's Butt said...

Great stuff. I couldn't agree more.

I've thought that, too, about government buildings. They spare no expense with our tax money. Don't they? How about all that vacation time and benefits we pay for some of the laziest, most incompetent people on the planet?

Cute remark by the daughter. Good point about the auto bluetooth chit.

 
At December 6, 2007 at 11:31 AM , Anonymous Logzie said...

"Does he have to go potty Daddy?"...now that's hilarious!! LOL!!!

 
At December 6, 2007 at 11:52 AM , Anonymous Matt-Man said...

That stupid Sherri chick is the same one who told Whoppi Goldberg that she wasnt sure if the world was round or flat. No, I'm not kidding.

Cheers!!

 
At December 6, 2007 at 12:00 PM , Anonymous Joker_SATX said...

God Hammer! I love your rants! I am just jealous that I can't rant as good as you. BTW, stop saying what I think! LOL!

Flyinfox_SATX

 
At December 6, 2007 at 1:05 PM , Anonymous tshsmom said...

I'm with you on the gov't buildings. I also get riled when my bank remodels, complete with fluffy carpet and velvet accouterments, every 2-5 years! No wonder they can't pay more than 1/4% interest on my savings account! All I care about the bank is that the vault that houses my safety deposit box is secure.

Who the hell hired that woman?! I guess I'm lucky that I work during the daytime TV hours.

I said the same thing your daughter said when I saw Eminem on the Grammies. The dumb kid thought he looked sexy, but to me, he needed to go potty. ;)

 
At December 6, 2007 at 1:32 PM , Anonymous Doggy Smile said...

Cars shouldn't have telephones or computers in them at all. It should be illegal to use them while you're driving, hands-free or not, it is still a distraction.

 
At December 6, 2007 at 2:54 PM , Anonymous Muskego Jeff said...

"Buildings used for government services and administration need . . . just enough furniture and personnel to get the job done."

If only that could happen. Government wouldn't be nearly as fun if they didn't have layer upon layer of useless people to do one single job.

 
At December 6, 2007 at 4:44 PM , Anonymous Mushy said...

I suppose the crotch grabbing is once of the most irritating things I see on TV...don't know why I watch it some times.

 
At December 6, 2007 at 4:50 PM , Anonymous katherine. said...

The Shepperd chick has got to go.

I like the government buildings as they are.

And the crotch grabbing is even MORE annoying when with a group of high school kids....I've been known to say..."what's wrong? Did you catch a rash?" (they HATE when I say that)

 
At December 6, 2007 at 4:53 PM , Anonymous Dan O. said...

As usual, parallel thinking from this end,Hammer.

Did Shepard maybe participate in the Bimbo Pageant in The South Carolina this summer?

It is my belief, in as much as maps are flat...and the earth is on a map...

Someone needs to burst the bubble in that bimbo's brain bowl and explain to her where the Christians got all their ideas for their holi(y)days.

 
At December 6, 2007 at 6:28 PM , Anonymous Barbara(aka Layla) said...

I tried to pick a "favorite" thing that bothered me from you list but they are all so asinine it's hard to decide which is the worst. I guess I have to go with the stupid chick from the view...what an insult. Who hired her?

AND a big thank you to you for the comment you left me about the guy that told me I was not "thin enough" for him to date. You may use a hammer but you ain't not tool. Guys like you remind me there's hope!

 
At December 6, 2007 at 7:27 PM , Anonymous Ordinary Janet said...

I guess that every day we get home in one piece is proof we're lucky.

As for the rest of it, they're all proof that our civilization is swirling down the toilet bowl.

 
At December 6, 2007 at 8:03 PM , Anonymous Scarlet said...

What I don't get about Maury is why would those guys even show up knowing it's televised, and the mom, can't she handle her business in private? What is up with that??

Grabbing the crotch is a huge problem in the office, too, not the all-female one I work at now, but all the others.

 
At December 7, 2007 at 2:34 AM , Anonymous Odat said...

LOL, I know these are not funny, but they are amusing the way you tell them.

But I so agree with you!

Peace

 
At December 7, 2007 at 6:24 AM , Anonymous Erica said...

Re: The new host of The View, I just saw a YouTube from "Are You Smarter Than a Fifth Grader" on someone's blog the other day.

When asked what country in Europe Budapest was the capital of, she responded, "I thought Europe was a country," and then proceeded to guess France.

I just don't understand how someone could go through life being dumber than belly button lint. I mean, did she even graduate from Kindergarten?

And why DO our tax dollars fund that superfluous fancy bullshit in gummint office buildings?

 
At December 7, 2007 at 11:00 AM , Anonymous Canadian flake said...

omggggggg tooooooooooo funny...

hammer, you crack me up dude!!!

 
At December 7, 2007 at 11:53 AM , Anonymous Ripple said...

I like the way you think, sir. I just disagree with you on the organic thing. The organic food that they have in your standard chain grocery store (Ralph's over here) pretty much does suck because nobody buys it there. Most of the good organic products are in the smaller markets that cater to those types of people. The organic fruits really do taste better. I haven't noticed a huge difference in vegetables, but really, that's not the point. The point is how they do their farming. The organic farmers do not use products that harm the earth. That to me is the big issue. I don't want to buy products from those folks that harm the earth.

 
At December 7, 2007 at 7:18 PM , Anonymous IEAT_SNOWMANPOOP said...

i found a onesie i want to get for our baby it said

I found my daddy on maury

 
At December 9, 2007 at 5:44 AM , Anonymous Kitem said...

I agree with you 100%, even though I've never heard of Sherri Shepherd.

 
At December 9, 2007 at 9:12 AM , Anonymous phlegmfatale said...

nothing predated Christianity? Wow - that's a staggering degree of ignorance!

All that extra distraction shit whilst driving is unconscionable. It's already so dangerous. People are frighteningly careless, eh?

 
At December 10, 2007 at 12:12 PM , Anonymous FHB said...

I watch very little TV that isn't the History/Discovery/Learning channel or a movie channel. Not a snob or anything. It's just all I have time for any more. Too much work and too many friggin' blogs to read.

I guess you can trace all that crotch grabbin' back to Elvis. Each generatuion has had to up the anty, all the way to Janet pullin' those tired of things out at the super bowl. I sure

 

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