My first time drinking

I was reading Steven Novak today and his post reminded me of an event in my youth.
When I was a kid, I avoided alcohol like the plague. There was so much peer pressure
to drink that I completely rebelled against it. Hell, my parents were offering me
10 bucks to drink a beer when I was seven. I told them to suck it. Well not exactly in those words..
Even when visiting my grandmother in the summer, she would say, "Dammit boy quit being a pussy and drink this beer!" It just bothered the hell out of them that I refused to even try it.
to drink that I completely rebelled against it. Hell, my parents were offering me
10 bucks to drink a beer when I was seven. I told them to suck it. Well not exactly in those words..
Even when visiting my grandmother in the summer, she would say, "Dammit boy quit being a pussy and drink this beer!" It just bothered the hell out of them that I refused to even try it.
My drunk Uncle used to say: "How you ever gonna get laid without liquor?"
I stood my ground. I used to have nightmares as a child with me having a drink in one hand a joint in the other. Weird shit. I decided to remain a teetotaler.
And much to the chagrin of everyone around me, I didn't touch alcohol or cigarettes and neither did any of my friends. We didn't miss it, and the choice saved us a lot of trouble too. I'm sure I missed out hanging out and having sex with the drunken skanks, getting arrested and getting my teeth kicked in during a drunken brawl like all the other cool kids in my neighborhood.
But I made these difficult sacrifices.
When I moved out of my parents house and got my own apartment, my best friend Paul and I were talking about what being drunk must feel like. He was a crazy daredevil fuck but like me, never drank. We were 19 at the time and too young to buy our own booze but we made a pact to try alcohol one time just to see what the big deal was.
Just so happened one girl that I was hanging out with at work (and other things) didn't mind buying a bottle of tequila for me and my friend. Don't ask me why I picked tequila, that is probably the stupidest choice for a first liquor. I think I was trying to show off or something...
Since my friend Paul worked at the local Stop and Rob, I told him to bring some stuff to mix the booze with. He showed up after work at my apartment with two of those tiny single serving cartons of orange juice like you get at McDonald's. Stupid cheap fucker.....
First thing I did was take our car keys and lock them inside my gumball machine...and put it on a high shelf. Don't ask...
We sat down at my little card table and proceeded to drink shots with a little orange juice in each one. We soon ran out of juice and ended up finishing the whole quart of Jose Cuervo in about 10 minutes. Damn now what?
At first we didn't feel anything, I was about 6'3 200 Lbs and Paul was 5'8 and 170 so I figured he was going to get a little drunker than me.
He said, "screw it I don't feel nothin, lets go get a pizza," I told him to just wait a minute to see if the booze was going to hit us. Paul said, "screw you I'm getting my keys!"...And he walked straight into a full length door poster of Chuck Berry and fell on the floor.
I started feeling a little dizzy myself and next thing I know Paul is trying to climb up on the closet shelf to retrieve his car keys. I tackled him and was about to beat his ass when I saw his face turn green.
He suddenly ran into my bathroom and started puking his guts out. I didn't feel so good either.
So I went into the other one and waited for my turn. But it never came. I just passed out on the floor in the hallway.
Next thing I know I'm waking up about 9am with a headache and the flavor of a leprosy diapers in my mouth. I went in to check on Paul and that poor fucker looked like he was going to die.
I've never seen anyone that sick. I gave him couple aspirin and mentioned going to the Mexican food buffet across the street.
Bad idea. He started dry heaving again but luckily his keg was floated and tapped out.
We didn't drink for a long time after that, but I felt pretty proud that I could down 16 shots of tequila on an empty stomach and just get a little nausea, headache and go unconscious.
Those were the days....
35 Comments:
Tequila with beer chasers is actually a favorite of mine; I like tequila because it doesn't give me a hangover or a sour stomach. The strange thing with tequila is that you can keep drinking it as long as you stay sitting; the minute you stand up and try to move, it seems to hit all at once.
"Next thing I know I'm waking up about 9am with a headache and the flavor of a leprosy diapers in my mouth."
Now THAT is a vivid and revolting mental image.
Tequila has always been the only liquor I couldn't stomach. No matter how good, Ta-Kill-Ya always activates the reverse gear on my peristalsis...;)
my mom says she doesn't ever drink because alcohol has no effect on her. none whatsoever.
She said she once drank a man under the table who did not believe her, and never felt a thing.
someone called me gross on my blog yesterday.
I am still sick as hell.
it sucks.
being called "so gross" sucks too.
Your first experience wasn't much fun at all. Poor baby. Or perhaps lucky.
So that's why my roommate acted like she and her chums had just been let out of the Zombie Zoo that one night...
Based on your experiences, I want to know what would be a safe celebratory drink on my 21st. My uncle's threatening to buy a bottle of absinthe for the occasion...
- ISU Tinkerer
BobG: I'ts taken a long time but now I can do tequila and beer again. Lots of lime and salt too.
Ambulance driver: I made the mistake of drinking rotgut tequila
"Ole montezuma" It's about turned me inside out.
infinitesinal: I read that comment.
I say we go kick his ass.
Jeannie: Yeah we were young and stupid. Probably lucky too.
ISU: Yeah drunk sick is bad.
My suggestion is salty dogs
1 shot of Tanqueray or Bombay sapphire, mixed with 3 oz of canned grapfruit juice served over crushed ice with a salt rimmed glass. The acid in the juice helps burn some of the alcohol. The gin is very clean without the tannins and impurities and they alslo taste great. You can actually subsitute any citrus juice but I like ruby red grapefruit in mine.
sex on the beach is a good drink too it's yummy!
I was way too young when I started drinking. I liked it too much I guess.
And thus, the death of the brain cells began.
Your writing her is great--I enjoyed this hugely, especially the whole keys/gumball machine thing.
I have never understood the big deal about smoke and alcohol neither
I had one notable tequila experience as a freshman in college at the University of Minnesota. I awoke the next morning, lying on tile floor next to a toilet. Some time later, I stumbled out onto campus——but a campus I did not recognize.
Sometime during the night, I had traveled 100 miles to River Falls, Wisconsin, and had passed out on the floor of the women's restroom in a dorm at the U of Wisconsin.
Oh lord... I'm surprised you ever drank anything again with that being your first pleasant experience...
YOu know, these days I don't drink at all.
I mean EVER.
I won't even eat a rum cake. ;)
Steve~
Your sensibility at even a young age amazes me! How did you get born with an abundance of morals, ethics and common sense??... oh, yeah... intelligence, too.
You sound like a good time! Nothing hotter than a man who blacks out and tastes like leprosy diagers! I wish I could remember the 1st time I drank!!!
Ah, the first drinking experience. When the word LIMIT does not exist. Yes, I'll have another 6 wine coolers, I'm a thirsty gal. Then, cool, is that Beer? Yeah, I want atleast 4 of those.
Spent the night hugging the porcelin water GOD. Yeah. Sounds like LIMIT had no meaning to you either. Glad you made it through with just a little nausea and passing out. I was not as lucky.
Later on, I found out that beer and wine is not a good mix. Pick your poison and stick with it. Hindsight. OH Well.
You did it just to see what it would be like? Brother, did you do the same with drugs?
I guess I was 17, wandered in to a party with a friend of mine at my grandmothers place.
Joined in all the fun, left a trail to the bathroom. LOL
My drunk Uncle used to say: "How you ever gonna get laid without liquor?"
Of course your uncle had it totally wrong. It's the woman that you need to get drunk to get laid. I wonder if your uncle ever got laid.
You were very lucky that you just got sick and passed out. If that happened to me I wouldn't touch tequila ever again.
So how long was it before you drank again?
I'm curious like Janet how long it was before you drank again.
Tequila is no joke. Like drinking kerosene. Only kind that's never given me a headache is Padron silver.
my ex and i were driving along through the sub-division one afternoon and we see two boys standing on the side of the road.
one of the boys keels over as we drive past and i slow down to see if the kids ok.
i notice that this friend is just standing there like a zombie and so i pull over realising that these two are messed.
i walk over and ask if they`re alright and so on, and i`m not getting any answers so i take the boy who`s still standing by the arm directly to the first house and press the doorbell.
my ex has stayed with the other boy during all this and is telling me that the kid is unconscious.
the boy i`m with is telling me what happened now.
his parents had gone out and he and his friend quickly downed an undisclosed amount of alcohol and then went outside to throw the football around, like kids do.
his friend only made it fifty feet or so before passing out.
the people at the house let us use the phone to call his parent`s cell phone and left a message.....
we went back outside and met a group of people including a policeman who wasn`t helping at all and a doctor who was checking the passed out boy and acting kind of nervous about the whole situation and several other people curious about what was going on.
the policeman finally told us that he would take care of the kids and we got in our car and drove on.
i felt deeply sorry for the kids, probably all of 14 or 15, as i could tell the shit they were heading for when the day progressed.......
the cop was a dick.
the doctor was useless.
and the niegbour had to be forced to let us use the god-damn phone.....politely, of course.
i came away thinking that i could handle my alcohol just way too well in my youth.
i was the dumbass that drove mostly.
i very rarely drink now at all. my substance of choice is adrenalin mixed with testosterone and some other neuro-transmitters that i haven`t got names for.
and i won`t drink and drive. ever.
Tequila is THE WRONG substance to get started on. The right one if you want to quit before you start.
Tequila is the only substance that had me hugging men and telling them that I LOVE THEM. Between pukes, of course.
bad stuff. Very bad.
Beeer and a little wine now and then.
Everything else can go to hell without me.
infinintsimal: Sex on the beach is wonderful except for the sand on the dick and pussy that shit hurts.
Carrie: youdid it right.
Jocelyn: Where else would you put cr keys?
Kirsten me either but it seems to be a cultual artifact.
Mystic wing: Holy shit! that is crazy! WTF why couldn't I have had good times like that?
devilbluedress: just barely
steven: I was close to that but getting laid depended on the hop and the grape.
Jean: I was born that way but for some reason, learning from others mistakes didn't pan out.
Leprosy diapers...I can't remember how many women I made out with in that condition ;)
Yep I had the mix hell. oh lord that was the time I prayed the hardest.
BBC that's for a different day. But I have to say booze is my friend overall.
Janet: a couple of years at least.
James Burnett: A long long time for a young dude trying to get into the scene.
Dr Alistair: those poor kids. The after effects should have been punishment enough.
Scott: I have male stalkers because of that vile liquid ;)
Booze burns out brain cells? Some claim that, hell, I can't wait. I'm sure I have way too many and I would like to become less aware.
Rum was my torture instrament of choice, also at 19. I'm still not much of a drinker because of that early experience.
More surprises.....you never cease to amaze me.....and that's a good thing.
I figured you were a drinker from waaaaaay back....??? Ha. I just have no idea!
I can't remember the first time I got drunk, but damn sure it wasn't on Tequila. Those worms put me off!! =)
Can't stand alcohol... It's just not enjoyable unless you wanna get drunk and I can't understand why anyone would wanna get drunk!
Perhaps I'm just being naive.
You picked a dandy to start your drinking career with. Tequilla shouldn't even be drank by experienced drinkers. That is some horrible stuff.
Do you still drink?
My stomach turned reading your post Hams - too many memories. As in all your posts, you sound like a great kid. What happened? Just kidding ((hugs)). Tequila creates a weird reaction in me. I drink it, I'm looking for a table and a victim. I just stay away from it. Bad, bad stuff.
Yeah I drank for a whole week one night...That is when my dad taught me about the Hair of the Dog. Now when I make a concious decision to go out and kill my liver and brain cells I make sure there is a Bud in the fridge and plenty of water!
Flyinfox_SATX
BBC: I have many relatives that have burned out their brains on alcohol. It's not pretty.
Kat: Rum is a horrible thing to overdo. I did that in New Orleans one time... yuck
kb: I Drink on the weekends sometimes and only if I have company. Drinking alone is boring.
The worms are in "mescal" another drink derived from cactus. I don't touch that stuff myself.
jingoistic: It's a toss up. drinking in moderation can be enjoyable.
Ryan: You ain't kiddin. Yeah on weekends sometimes I'll have a few beers or martini's but not on the same night ;)
Barista: Thanks :)Tequila is crazy stuff. Just the smell of it can gag a maggot.
Flyinfox: What a week lol. I don't do hair of the dog. sometimes I swear never again ..until the next time rolls around.
brain cells grow back.
seriously.........
that`s no excuse though.
Well then doc.....
A round for all on me! **snickers**...**looks for a table**
but it can be a reason......
Once drank Tequila and woke up in acompletely black, dark place. Had to find ny way to the door using a ciggies lighter. Am I the only one who admits to drinking and smoking? If so I have a hell of a big industry to sustain on my own.
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