Cars meme

Stucco suggested that we do a meme where we talk about the one car we wish we had back and and also the car we wish we never had.

It's a really tough decision but I would have to say for me the one I wish I had back was my 73 Plymouth Satellite Sebring. It has a funny story to go along with it:

I used to work at a company with my best friend Gary, I wrote about him here.. His dad (I'll call Johnny) was a VP of manufacturing and making a lot of money. He went through cars like they were kleenex. Gary's dad had borrowed against the company stock and bought a lot of cool grownup toys, corvettes, jeeps, ATVs, and stuff. The stock went tits up and Johnny was fucked when the bank came for the loan. Johnny was a dick to work for and had stolen our Christmas bonus 3 years in a row instead of distributing the money to his employees, so I kinda chuckled when he had to stick all his toys up on the auction block. He was an asshole.

Now near destitute from his unwise money habits Johnny needed a car. He was an intelligent man overall and knew his way around vehicles. He bought a 1973 Plymouth Satellite Sebring. It was white with Avocado top and Avocodo paisley interior. It was in perfect condition and he paid $700 for it.

As soon as Johnny pulled into work driving the Satellite, the other VP's in the company saw it and he became a laughing stock, the other guys invested their stock money and got rich, they were driving Lexus's, Caddies and BMWs.

I broke a commandment and coveted that car. I must have asked to buy it off him a dozen times. It was perfect. I had to have it. Johnny soon got back on his feet and bought a Ford F350 Diesel.

Gary's 1989 mustang convertible was stolen from my apartment complex so he inherited the Satellite. At least I got to ride in it now. Gary was ambivalent, he didn't give a shit about the car and being the nasty slovenly fucker he was, he began abusing the car horribly.

He never changed the oil, He used the back seat for a garbage dumpster. He threw half eaten food over his shoulder as he drove. He went to the river with some of the guys at work and left an ice chest full of meat and beer in the trunk for six months.

I was saddened when I saw the car. The back seat was level full to the windows with stinky garbage, the ice chest full of meat had putrefied and you couldn't get within 10 feet of the car without falling down and puking your guts out.

Gary didn't mind the smell at all. I had to ride in it when my own car broke down and I spent the whole time with my head out the window gagging. I offered to remove the rotten meat bomb but Gary had lost the trunk key. Since it really didn't bother him, it wasn't on his list of priorities.

One day Gary got a hair up his ass about wanting a 68 cougar. So he went and bought one. He got screwed, it was made up of several different cars and a magnet would not stick to any part of the thing. ( all plastic body filler). But Gary was just as impulsive and unwise as his father.

So he parked the satellite in his back yard and left it to rot.

Here was my chance. I sold my Chevy Nova to a friend who had blown up the motor in his car. This started a chain of events. When I get my mind set on something it usually happens.

Gary was starting a new job and didn't have money for the proper dress attire. so I took him to Mervyns with my charge card and said I would buy him $300 worth of clothes if he gave me the Satellite.

Deal!

I drove the poor thing home, it hadn't had an oil change in about 30,000 miles, it kept overheating and the frigging thing wouldn't stay running. The smell had died down a little from the ice chest, so I was able to roll all the windows down and get it home.

Luckily, the outside of the car had so much built up grime that it protected the paint.
I used a shovel to empty the fossilized pizza, burgers and burritos from the back seat. That disgusting mess filled up 5 large black trash bags. Gary was a filthy disturbed fucker....

I soaked a large tube sock with Brute 33 cologne and tied it around my face. The neighbors looked concerned but since this was pre 9/11 it was no big deal.

I drilled the lock on the trunk and opened it...

The blast of hot stench penetrated my protection and about knocked me out. I was almost tempted to open the cooler to see what had transpired over the last 8 months, but my common sense got the better of me. I dragged it next to the apartment dumpster and left it in case someone wanted to claim the ice chest and get a surprise Tee hee.

I changed the oil, added lubralon (great engine restorer) flushed the radiator, changed the plugs and wires, washed and waxed it and steam cleaned the interior.

The car started right up and was perfect again. I was very happy.I installed a CD player in the glove box and some 6x9 speakers in the trunk. The car sounded great. I could get this car up to 130 on the highway, it had ice cold AC and comfortable bucket seats. Even if they were Dark Green Paisley..

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One day, I was waiting at a stop sign and a girl in a little Dodge Shadow rear ended me at about 40mph. Her car was flattened up to the firewall, the poor driver had to be taken to the hospital. It dented my trunk a little. Since my car was so old, the adjuster totaled my car. The insurance company gave me $600 and let me buy the car back for $50. I drove it for another year or so. I wasn't too happy about the rear end damage and I couldn't find anyone who would fix the car for under $1500.

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One day the AC compressor went out so I took it in and traded it on a loaded 1986 Grand Marquis. They said they would work out any trade so I brought my junker in and got another $500 for it. I wish I had that car or another one like it.

Next post will be about the car I wish I never had.

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Anyone who wants to do this meme and write about the car they wish they had back, I'd like to read about it.