Guantanamo. The new vacation hot spot.

Since I am a regular blogger guy I have hired a celebrity (James Brown) to translate the following information.....



Facts about Guantanamo



1. The detainees at the Guantanamo Bay detention facility include bin Laden’s bodyguards, bomb makers, terrorist trainers and facilitators, and other suspected terrorists.

"I got soul, ha, and I'm super bad, heh! Got the mullah that tells me what to do We are some nasty dudes! Uh huh!"

2. More money is spent on meals for detainees than on the U.S. troops stationed there. Detainees are offered up to 4,200 calories a day. The average weight gain per detainee is 20 pounds.

MMMM! MMMM! Chicken and Mash taters. WOW! My pants is bustin! Wooo!

3. The Muslim call to prayer sounds five times a day. Arrows point detainees toward the holy city of Mecca.

Step off! Shake your hands! Point yo self to the holy land! OW!

4. Detainees receive medical, dental, psychiatric, and optometric care at U.S. taxpayers’ expense. In 2005, there were 35 teeth cleanings, 91 cavities filled, and 174 pairs of glasses issued.

Doctah! Doctah! Help Me Please Please Please!

5. The International Committee of the Red Cross visits detainees at the facility every few months. More than 20,000 messages between detainees and their families have been exchanged.

I sent a letter to my honey.... woooooo ooooo.. my hot hot burka burka baby OHHHH... UH HUH gonna light my shoes!

6. Recreation activities include basketball, volleyball, soccer, pingpong, and board games. High-top sneakers are provided.

Gots me a turban...some hightops and the bassaball blues oooh no! dem no skills bassaball blues...

7. Departing detainees receive a Koran, a jean jacket, a white T-shirt, a pair of blue jeans, high-top sneakers, a gym bag of toiletries, and a pillow and blanket for the flight home.

Wo! I don wanna I don wanna ever ever leave.
Don't make me go back home baby ohhhh noooooo please don't make me go.....

8. Entertainment includes Arabic language TV shows, including World Cup soccer games. The library has 3,500 volumes available in 13 languages — the most requested book is “Harry Potter.”

Hey! gimme!, huh! gimme some Goblet of fire! uh! gimme, gimme Some Surround sound mama, a super bad brother Askaban, ha! heh!

9. Guantanamo is the most transparent detention facility in the history of warfare. The Joint Task Force has hosted more than 1,000 journalists from more than 40 countries.10. In 2005, Amnesty International stated that “the detention facility at Guantanamo Bay has become the gulag of our times.”

I gots the gulag blues baby but its better way way better than a suicide belt and sand in my shoes woah ohhh

Hat tip to Christopher Taylor at Word Around the Net