Net blues... thoughts on getting spammed

You know, it's kind of hard not to get worn down by all the crap thats thrown at you day after day.

I like to use the internet to take a break from worries, play a game, write an email, read a blog or two. Recently however, I realized that using the computer can be just as stressful and frustrating as walking through a gaggle of mimes, panhandlers and pickpockets.

Email

Yeah. We all get spam, Is your wee wee big enough, hard enough?

Grab dookie shoeshine, Huh? Who uses that for a subject line? Oh.. its some phony stock tip. What kind of moron is going to take a hot stock tip from someone who spams it to sixty million people with some schizophrenic subject line about dookie and shoeshines.

Please verify your Ebay information and include your name address and bank account info or we will be forced to deactivate your account.

...Sure buddy let me grab my ankles too.

I am chief colonel zeppedy boppity boo and I am pleasing to your assistance in transferring sixty million Euros from my late corrupt dictator fathers estate to your bank account.

I'm sorry. People who fall for this without doing at least a tiny bit of research aren't going to get a lot of sympathy from me.

Then there are the less than savvy friends and relatives that send the chain letters embedded into sixty fowarding attachments that take 20 minutes to open.

Yeah, Coke is giving away a warehouse full of Dell laptops to anyone who forwards this letter to 10 people. Do the people who forward these things actually think they are going to get something?

I've been getting these chain letters for over ten years and to my knowledge
AIN"T NOBODY GOT NUTHIN SO FAR! So give up the retarded shit already!

So I decide to go over to usenet newsgroups for some old school forums, car pictures, jokes etc...

More spam, then there's always some arm chair commando ready to jump down my throat for any post I make, calling me a fucktard, (always some brit calling me a fucktard) I just asked for an opinion on DVD burners for christ sake...

Then there are the popups. I'm reading the news on some major web page and I get
popups about everything from prostate exams to computer dating hot singles in my area... My popup blocker isn't even fast enough to keep up it's like.. beep beep beep beeeeeep oh fuck it.

It's enough to make me want to take the computer to the dumpster so that the poor schmuck that finds it can also inherit my high blood pressure.